BALANCE: A More Useful Perspective
Why is "balance" so elusive?
And is there a better way to achieve it? As part of my ongoing yoga teacher training, I came across an interesting concept: your best self comes from a harmonious balance of inward and outward activity. So what the heck does that mean? It means spending as much energy/focus on your internal state of mind, health, and restorative internal practices as you do performing outward activities such as work, tending to others, etc. Here are ways to make this a practical reality:
Balancing the Inner and Outer
The Vibe: Instead of chasing the elusive and cliche 'work/life balance', you can balance your internal and external activity, which is figuring out the things that replenish you vs. things that you do for reasons outside of yourself. Realizing and defining these internal and external buckets, you can come up with a personalized plan that is easier to attain. You can create a more balanced, aligned flow amidst life's changes instead of trying to hold onto a static state of balance (which we all know is impossible!)
The Details: What is internal activity? This is the time and energy you spend meditating, reflecting, thinking, feeling, and restoring your mindset. It includes your values, passions, and purpose (don't worry if you aren't clear on your purpose, it takes time and exploration for most). It is the work you do internally to improve your life.
Your external activity includes the energy spent in the world outside of yourself - working, taking care of others, doing the day-to-day things to secure shelter, food, and your physical belongings.
In today's world, most of us spend the majority of our time on external activity since that is seen, judged, and rewarded. This leaves us with very little time, attention, and focus on our internal needs which creates stress, anxiety, and a disconnect from our true selves. Too much time on the external makes us feel unbalanced.
So how do you better balance these two activities?
To Thrive: Define your personal internal activity and see where it can align with your external activity to create more harmony and balance.
Step 1 - You need to know what is most important to you to define your internal activity. Take time to get clear on your values, the activities that restore your mindset, and things that feel energizing and healing. For me, it includes time in nature, connection with others, making a positive impact on others, physical activity, meditation, and journaling.
If you aren't clear on this or just can't set aside the time to focus on it, I offer a Life Vision Intensive, designed to uncover your core values and define what a successful life means to you - MORE INFO HERE.
Step 2 - List all the activities you do in your external world and see if/where they align with your internal activity. Can you make any changes to put more into your internal bucket? For example, if spending time in nature restores you, and you spend most of your day on calls, is there an opportunity to take any of your calls outside?
If you value sustainability, does your career support sustainability in any way? Or is there a way you can start being part of activities that are more sustainable?
If your mind feels overstimulated and you feel exhausted at the end of each day, can you trade 15 minutes of Netflix for a 15-minute guided meditation?
If you love to shop (external activity), can you shop for healthier foods and energizing books (internal fuel) to utilize?
If you spend your day surrounded by colleagues but still feel lonely, can you set aside time for quality interactions with someone you love? Or better yet, spend time reflecting on all of the things you love about yourself and fill your own bucket with self-love.
Many people need alone time to restore themselves. For me, being around others that I feel comfortable with is one of the most energizing, restorative activities. So networking, being in groups, and coaching all day doesn't drain me as much as it may drain someone else. Each of our desired "balance" equations between internal and external activity will look very different.
The key is to intentionally turn your focus inward as much as you spend your energy on the outward. This means reflecting on your actions, how you feel, and doing the things necessary to fill you, from the inside out. The external world will continue to demand your time and attention. It is up to you to balance your internal and external activity in order to create more harmony and fulfillment.
The traditional work/life balance conversation addresses your external activity; it just differentiates what you are doing externally for your career vs. what you do externally for your family and for yourself. But many activities "for you" are society's influence of what you need, not your own internal, real restorative activities.
Which is why even if you do a great job "balancing" work and life, you may still feel exhausted, unfulfilled, and meh.
This new focus on internal vs. external activity helps shine a light on 1) what you need to feel good on the inside, and 2) where you can align what you do externally with what you need internally.
Maybe you are asking yourself "Is this any easier to attain than the ever-elusive work/life balance?" I say YES! Because when you start to align your internal and external activity, it becomes easier to find the time for the internal things that are easy to neglect.
This isn't about balancing your time as much as it is about balancing your energy. For someone whose work is 100% aligned with their values and internal needs, working 50 hours a week may be sustainable and enjoyable. For the person whose career isn't aligned at all, working a 50-hour week can be stressful, draining, and eventually make them miserable and sick.
Get out of the mindset of balancing your hours, and instead, focus on balancing your internal needs with your external activity. If this concept still feels fuzzy, I am here to help :)
Schedule time to talk here.
Cheers to fulfilling and sustainable balance,
Sharon
We ALL need support
You are not alone. I can help you gain clarity on how to enjoy life AND succeed, all while better balancing your internal and external activity. Whether it is to better enjoy the rest of summer or set yourself up for success for the rest of this year, I offer clarity sessions, consistent support, and accountability through several options. Schedule a free, confidential strategy call by CLICKING HERE (Choose Free Strategy Session) and we can decide what's best for you.
Life is too short to keep putting off what you really want. Don't stay stuck feeling stressed, overwhelmed, and unsatisfied. I've helped so many improve their happiness, well-being, and success because they chose to schedule a call and take one step towards the life of their dreams. I can help you too.
