How Connection Helps You Win
Your Net Worth = Your Network
The old saying "It isn't what you know, it's who you know" has a lot of merit whether we like it or not. Yes, you also have to know what you are doing. But the reality is that all of the decisions made about your promotion, being hired, or being selected will happen in rooms that you aren't in. As Carla Harris says, "They won't promote you not because they don't like you, but because they don't know you." Because who is going to stick their neck out for someone they don't know?
Connection
To get to really know someone, there has to be an authentic connection, which means knowing something real about the other person, not just superficial facts.
When I worked for a Japanese pharma company, most ex-pats started each presentation with a slide about who they were personally.
These slides included their families, hobbies, interesting places they explored, choirs they participated in, favorite foods, and/or their favorite karaoke song. It was so refreshing to know a little bit more about this person that I was going to be working with. Even if we had nothing in common, I felt more connected.
In feeling more connected, it opened the door for conversation and a willingness to work together. This is the value of bringing authenticity into work.
Sure, your schooling, work history, and years in this field matter, but no one connects with that. We're all here because we're qualified. But who are you really?
I want to be clear here. When people say they want you to bring your "whole self" to work - they DO NOT mean it.
No one wants your bad habits, crankiness, short temper, gossiping, drama, or uninformed assumptions. What they do want is for you to bring more of who you really are into work, but within the general guidelines of building positive relationships and collaborative workspaces.
You - not the entire personal you - but more than just the work you. Something in between that allows for real connection but doesn't cross the HIPAA line.
Think about your best boss. What did you know about them? What did they know about you? What level did you connect on?
I'm not implying you have to get super personal. But did this boss treat you as a human with respect, and maybe have a laugh or two with you? Did this person understand (even if it was at a high level) some of the challenges you have and help you succeed anyway?
We aren't robots. If all you let someone know about you is your resume, then you might as well be a robot. Because without connection you are another number, another body doing work, another replaceable employee.
When you truly connect with someone, it highlights your different motivators, challenges, talents, and definitions of success. It helps build goodwill so that on the rare day that you do have a hissy fit, it doesn't ruin your entire reputation. And it makes work so much more enjoyable!
I talk with people that don't like this approach. They feel work is work, and that's how it should be. They believe the work should speak for itself (but it doesn't). They believe that building relationships feels phony and too much like schmoozing.
And they are constantly wondering why they aren't getting promoted, invited to the big conferences, and put on the visible projects. They beat their head against the same wall, willing to do almost anything other than connect at an authentic level.
Maybe because they've been burned in the past, maybe because they are more introverted, maybe because they feel they don't have the time. And while all of these are valid, they are also things you can overcome.
I'm not telling you that you have to connect. I am telling you that if you don't, you can't expect to get ahead as much as someone who is doing what you are doing and also connecting.
Love it or hate it, that's how the world (and especially corporate) works.
It is always your choice.
I hope you choose to connect with those in your life. Not just show up, but truly connect. Start small, build trust, and open the door to get to know someone a bit better while letting them know you.
Your net worth = your network. The more people you connect with (not just know), the more you will be invited into the spaces and opportunities that help you succeed.
Because if they know your motivations, what you want in this world, and why, they will think of you when those opportunities arise.
I help my clients build their network in ways that feel authentic to them. Whether you are struggling with time to build your network or ways to connect more authentically, I can help. Set up time HERE for a free call.
Cheers to connection,
Sharon
PS - I share a blend of personal and professional on my LinkedIn because no one wants to be coached by someone until they know who that person is and some of the stuff they've been through. I'd love your feedback - do you find my posts useful, too personal, too vague, or not engaging?
Connect with yourself to connect with others
What do you really want in life, and how can you share that? I help clients gain clarity on the life they really want and create a pathway to achieve it. The first step is defining what success means to you in your health, relationships, finances, community, and career - something I help each client discover, document, and refine.
Schedule a free strategy call to discuss where you are and what you want by CLICKING HERE. I take pride in providing practical, actionable steps that work in your very busy life so that you can create work/life success on your terms.
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